Joy Unspeakable

It has been awhile since I written. Grace continues to do so well. We continue to be so blessed by her. To take a child from a place where there is little hope for a good education and medical treatment to a place where she will get the best of both... bringing a child into a home that will teach her about the God who created her and who has a good plan for her life. It is JOY UNSPEAKABLE! We are looking forward to our first Christmas as a family of 6. Our hearts ached the past couple Christmases because of this space in our family that was yet to be filled. I watched as she looked in wonder at our lighted Christmas tree and carefully placed an ornament on it and I was just overwhelmed with all that God has done to bring her into our family. The New Year will bring lots of challenges with speech therapy and surgeries but for the rest of this year we will just enjoy this carefree time with Gracie Mei. I am certain that she will enjoy her first Christmas!

IU Evaluation

We had our evaluation at the IU recently. Could I be any more proud of this girl? She did so well with all of the tests. She surprised me a bit picking out which boy in pictures was running and which one was eating etc. etc. They had a Chinese translator there for her but she didn't really need her. She is doing so well with English. There were all sorts of specialists there evaluating her fine and gross motor skills, cognitive abilities, and language development. Seemed like her receptive language was very good but expressive language a bit lacking. She will need speech for sure because it is very hard to understand what she is saying. We don't think she will make too much progress in speech until she has her next two surgeries Regardless, we will still go one time a week once her IEP is written and we meet with them again. There is an IU speech therapist that specializes in kids with clefts and works out of the Lancaster Clinic so we will go there for speech. Other than speech I don't think she will qualify for any other services but maybe they will qualify her and just come once a month to give me ideas to keep her on track developmentally. They were all such amazing, upbeat, competent people!

We scheduled another team visit at the Lancaster Clinic early in January to discuss and arrange for surgery. It will most likely be a total lip revision and z-plasty (lengthening of the palate). These are not dangerous surgeries but will require a couple days in the hospital and 6 weeks of a soft diet. Good thing she likes congee and noodles! The lip repair takes about 6 months to heal. the lip revision worries me the most. She is so active. I can't imagine her being careful not to fall or bump into something and she will probably have to wear arm restraints for awhile so she does not touch her face. Oh, it all makes me sad but from what we hear from her major palate surgery in China she is very brave. She will be a trooper about it all and Mom and Dad will be a mess for sure!

Cleft Team Appointment

We went to the Lancaster Clinic today for Grace's big appointment. We saw a speech therapist, orthodontist, dentist, craniofacial surgeon/plastic surgeon all in one afternoon. The Lancaster Clinic was one of the pioneers of the "team approach" to treating cl/cp. You see all of the specialists in one day and then all of the specialist meet together in the evening to discuss a course of action for your child. We were SO impressed with everyone there.

The speech therapist had so many positive things to say about Grace. We talked to the therapist most of the time but she did work with Grace for just a few minutes. Grace showed improvement in that short time! We will set up speech therapy once a week in the next month or so.

The surgeon confirmed what we had expected... her lip and palate are in need of much repair. He was straight forward about it but very optimistic and certainly not shocked about any aspect of her condition. He has been doing these repairs for 25 years in the US and on medical mission teams oversees. There is nothing he has not seen and he has done hundreds upon hundreds of these surgeries. The procedures that she will need will be spread out over time. Step by step. The first step will be a Z-plasty which is a procedure to lengthen the palate as well as a complete lip revision. The muscles on her lip were not connected properly so they will take care of that and do some other cosmetic changes. Her nose will not need too much repair but will improve in appearance when her lip is corrected. We will schedule the Z-plasty and lip revision sometime in the Spring most likely. The z-plasty will greatly improve her speech so we want to do it soon but not too soon because we want to love on her a little more before we put her through a major, but not dangerous=), surgery. We have come so far in bonding with Grace we don't want to take a step back quite yet. 6 months home is about the recommended time before surgery if possible.

Grace did such a great job with it all. We were such the proud parents! She was high fiving everyone and showing off. She took to the surgeon right away which was so cute. You could tell that he just loves kids. She could tell too. It is funny, we talk about all of these corrections that will be made and we do really want the very best for her but we just love her little face. It is hard to think that she will look different than she does now. Her Daddy has been smitten with her since the first day her little picture came across our computer, split pants and all! lol! As she goes through times in her life and develops her own self-concept, I hope she fully realizes how strikingly beautiful her Daddy thought she was even before all of these cosmetic changes.

We are just overjoyed with the level of care available to sweet Grace right down the street from our house. It was one of the million pieces of the puzzle that allowed this miracle to happen in our lives.

We will have Grace evaluated at the IU next week so more to come.

Home a month+

Can't believe we have been home more than a month! Rob had the flu this past week. It was horrible! I think the kids all had a touch of it except Grace. She has been healthy as can be. I have avoided it as well. Anyway, wanted to post about regular life because we will probably post a lot next week concerning our meeting with the cleft team on Tuesday.

Grace continues to do so well. She is happy, energetic, determined, and sooooo loved! I have returned to my two mornings of teaching PE at Cole's school and she has done well staying with my Mom. We practiced separating a few times before my first morning and she does well. The first time I left her to go run a quick errand she cried a little and then played happily. She didn't want me to put shoes on for the rest of the day though! After a few other practice times of separation she seems to be doing well with it. I think she is understanding that Mommy always comes back just like Daddy does.

Grace is very active and very busy. She loves to sing and dance and play outside. We hike in the woods just about every day and visit the little park at the church. She is learning to pedal a bike and doing pretty well with it. When it rains we all get very antsy! Cody and Grace need a lot of supervision so I don't get much done during the day. Call before you come over or you may witness what appears to have been a major disaster inside my house=) Grace loves taking baths, putting things in and out of her Dora backpack, and playing with Daddy. Her Dora backpack is falling apart. She fills it so full with heavy stuff and carries it everywhere. I don't understand how her shoulders take it!

One of the most challenging thing is Grace's speech. She understands us so well but she has trouble saying a lot of sounds so it is hard to understand her. This considered, it is truly remarkable how well we do communicate. She has a way of telling us how she feels and what she wants despite her speech delay. At times though her inability to communicate clearly can be frustrating to her and to us. She yells and grunts a lot when she wants something which can be tough to hear again and again but she is slowly learning to break this habit and ask for help, or chocolate, appropriately=)

Grace is doing very well at nap and bed times. These are the times she usually would cry and cry for her foster grandmother. She doesn't cry anymore and she responds well to looking at their pictures and talking about China and the adoption. We talk about the day Gracie met her Ma ma and her Ba Ba and how it was hard to say bye bye to her Nai nai and Ye ye. We ask her if she has to say bye bye to Ma Ma and Ba Ba and she says no no no no. We say that's right no more big changes, this Ma Ma never leave this Ba Ba (Daddy) forever. She has been told these things often in Chinese and English. I really do sense she understands.

Well, that is it for now. Thanks for checking in on us!!!

GREAT NEWS!!!

Our pediatrician has reviewed all of Grace's tests except the lead level which will come in soon and the results were all wonderful! We are so thrilled. It had been a year since Grace's medical report in China so we did not know what to expect. We tested for everything you could imagine and it all looks great. No HIV, Syphilis, she is not a carrier of Hep B or C and has never been exposed to it, no anemia, great blood counts, her bone density is great, nothing wrong with her rib cage, no parasites, ova etc. Lots of other stuff I can't remember. It did not appear from her blood work that she has been properly immunized so we will do them all. We have already started the life-threatening vaccinations. This is great news. Now if you could all join me in the doxology=)

Home almost 3 weeks

In a couple of days have been home 3 weeks with Grace. This week we are doing tons of blood work and a couple other tests. The blood work today was tough on Grace but she gets over it all quickly and doesn't blame me=) I will post next week with results from all of the tests. Grace is really doing well. Rob and I both cannot believe how far she has come in such a short time. We are seeing more and more of her personality as she gets comfortable with us and her surroundings. She truly is a sweetheart. She is falling asleep so much more peacefully and she wakes up happy to see us! She loves all kids but takes awhile to warm up to adults. Our other kids are not shy so this has been a new thing for us. She is bonding well with Mom and Dad so that is the goal at this point. She really is a good kid. She listens well. She is particular about things which can be hard because of the language barrier. She can't always tell us what she wants and how she wants it=) She understands us so well and say words in English but will need surgery and speech therapy to help her with many of the sounds she cannot say. We continue to be overwhelmed with what a blessing she is to all of us.

First Dr. Appointment

We made it though our first week home. Grace had her first appointment with Pia, our pediatrician. Pia was very encouraging and happy with her overall health. she was very happy with the way Gracie seemed to be bonding with me. She says sleep issues will probably last about 6 months. I showed her pictures of her foster home so she had and idea of where she was coming from. It is hard for me to describe her foster home. She slept in a broken crib without a mattress with her foster brother. The crib was beside the kitchen table. The walls and floor concrete. We decided to take every precaution concerning immunizations and run a load of tests. We will get them done in the next couple of weeks. Grace's rib cage protrudes a bit so we are going to x-ray that to see if there was a fracture or something. Of course Pia was horrified as we all were at Grace's teeth. So many of them are rotten. The teeth that you can see when she smiles look o.k. which is nice but boy oh boy don't look too close. Pia says to expect a lot of metal! We meet with the entire cleft team Nov. 3rd so we will wait until then to see their dentist. Grace still has a small hole in her palate that will need to be repaired so they will probably do it all at once. We will update more about the medical stuff when we get tests back. Pray!

The Homecoming

Poor Gracie Mei had never been in a car seat and was pretty traumatized to be strapped in. Aunt Linda picked us up from the airport and heard a lot of crying on the way home! She slept though until we pulled into our drive. I was a complete mess by that point. Rob held Grace and the kids tackled us on the front porch. We all sat there hugging and sobbing. Never again will I be away from them for that long (15 days) until they leave me! Grace came inside and pretty quickly got down and ran around the fireplace to play peek-a-boo. She was laughing with the kids and playing with toys. My parents gave her space which I am sure was hard for the to do! The kids were so excited about her and Cole kept asking when she could come to his school to meet his class. Julia was super ready to have a little sister and Cody kept saying "Hi Gracie Mei". It was all going so much better than I had anticipated.
Sleep would be tough for the next several days. We were trying to get over a 12 hour time difference. Rob continues to be amazing with Grace. She goes to sleep for him much better than she does for me. We had grandparents only visiting which helped Grace not feel anxious. She was not comfortable with commotion other than kid commotion=) She did not quite know how to interact with people she did not know. She wanted to play with them but would throw a toy at them so she would not have to get to close. Or she would just start kind of "acting out" throwing things or flopping herself on the ground when new people were around. She still struggled a great deal with nap time and bed time the first week home although it was improving quite a bit thanks to Rob's hard work. We have a Chinese friend who came over and talked to her again about what was going on. We gave Grace a photo album of all of us and her new home. She loves it. We put a picture of Grace and her foster mother and father in the album then a picture of Rob and I and Grace with her foster mother the day we adopted her and finally a picture of just Rob and I and Grace. This 3 photo story so to speak was an idea I got from a book I had read before we left. I think it is really helping Grace with her grief. She at times takes the adoption day picture out of the book and pretends to rip it up. She never does though but keeps putting it in and out. I am sure that day was so tough for her. She absolutely loves the picture of Rob and I with her in her new house. She kisses it and gets so excited about it. We are surely making a lot of progress in a short time. It is amazing the way kids adapt.

More on Guangzhou

There were so many adoptive families at the White Swan. There was a play room for the children. Gracie Mei is so playful so we were there quite a bit. It was so interesting talking to the other families. I think all the kids had some kind of special need. Lots of families back for the second time to adopt. Their older adopted child along with. There was such a range of experiences. Some people reported that their children had been so well taken care of and their province and orphanage were beautiful and well maintained. Others had stories of children extremely malnourished with major parasites. There were children who were 3 and looked like they were 1 and children who were 8 who looked like they were 5. There were older children being adopted who surprisingly had no formal education. Could not write their name or add 1 +1 in Chinese. There were 4 year olds who could not stand up from a seated position. You could see major positive changes in just 4 or 5 days though. Major miracles all around. Overall it was just amazing to think about all of the children there entering into families where they would be loved and where their needs would be well met.
Gracie Mei was getting more and more comfortable with us and her surroundings. I missed the kids so much and wanted so much to go home but I just could hardly handle the thought that Grace would have to go through yet another huge change. Up to this point I am sure she thought we would always live in a 5 star hotel with a huge breakfast buffet! lol! I worried about how it would all go with the kids at home. Grace was doing well with other kids at the White Swan but she really did not trust adults. She would shake her head no at people and if they would get too close she would act like she was going to hit them. We noticed that she acted this way pretty much only to white people. Oh, she had a lot to learn. When we would be in an unfamiliar situation with crowds around us etc. Grace would many times hit or scratch us. We could tell she didn't mean to be mean but was just very unsure of what was going on around her and of course unable to express her fear appropriately.
We flew to Beijing and then New Jersey on Thursday. It took us over 26 hours from door to door. Grace did amazingly well. We flew during the night and she slept for 8 hours and then again for an hour or so. Not bad for a 13 hour flight!

Guangzhou

We would stay in Guangzhou for about 6 days. It was great to be reunited with the families in our agency and see them with their children! We stayed at the White Swan Hotel where just about every family who is adopting stays at the end of there trip to finish their paperwork and swear in at the US consulate. It was very touching to see all of the families there with their newly adopted children. They all have very different stories. China is so big and diverse. Grace was doing better each day but I would have to work very hard to earn her trust after being so sick and unavailable. It took a lot of effort the first day to get her to let me hold her hand and to eat with me present. We made good progress but took a step back the next morning. By the end of the second day though she was calling me Mama and letting me hold her. She was still a Daddy's girl though and will probably be for life! The next several days we would send Daddy away for long periods of time so I could bond with her. If Rob was around she wanted nothing but him. Can't say I blame her=) It dawned on me though that Rob would be going to work Friday of that week so although Rob would have liked us all to be together he agreed to disappear for some Mommy only moments. We had such a great time together going to the pool and eating and playing. She was so attached to her shoes and would not take them off even to go to bed so I took her to buy squeaky shoes. They are popular in China. Shoes that squeak. They are annoying but boy she threw off those old shoes and squeaked right out of the store in those squeaky shoes! Grace's nap and bedtimes were still very hard. She was getting comfortable in Province but then we had to leave for Guangzhou and she had to adjust to yet another new place. She was doing great during the day though. Our guides throughout the trip were so great about talking to Grace for us in Chinese. They would explain to her what was going on and tell her that it was ok to cry but to let us hold her. Grace was at first always looking for her foster mom but the guides would tell her that she was far away and that she would not see her again. They would tell her that we loved her and would always be good to her and never leave her. This was hard for Grace and she didn't want to hear it but it helped so much. She was more and more calm and less on hyper alert. In Guangzhou we took her to a park and learned that she had never been down a sliding board. It was so wonderful to teach her how to do it and see her squeal in delight and do it over and over again! This has been the most difficult and most rewarding thing I have ever done. More on Guangzhou soon!

Hefei - Capital of Grace's province

We flew into Hefei in the Anhui Province on Sunday night and we would be able to meet Grace on Monday morning. I was getting very nervous. Typically you go the Civil Affairs building and the orphanage director would bring the child there and hand them to their new parents. It is such an abrupt change for the child. Since Grace has been in foster care for at least a year and a half she would not even know the orphanage director. Everyone was saying that the foster mom would not come and that we would not get to meet her. We pleaded with our guide to try to find out more information for us and sent emails home asking everyone to pray that somehow it would be possible for the foster mom to be present and for Grace to have time to warm up to us. We left for the Civil Affairs building and a few minutes after arriving they said that Grace was there. We watched her walk down the hall holding her foster mother's hand. What a powerful moment. Grace is almost 3 so 2 white strangers taking her from the only life she knew was going to be very difficult. We were able to get her to interact with us a little bit but she was very reluctant even to be near us. Her records had indicated that she was shy and not fond of strangers so we were not surprised. We would find out later that they had not prepared Grace at all for the adoption. We had sent pictures of us but they did not show them to her. They said she was too young to understand. Peeling her away from her foster mom was too much for me to handle so I asked our guide if by chance the foster mom could come to our hotel with us. The director agreed and said he would pick her up later that day! Wow! I couldn't believe it. We did our paperwork and left for the hotel. At the hotel we played outside for a long time and had a chance to ask the foster mom every question we could think of about Grace. Grace called me Mama for the first time there. We all had lunch together at the hotel and Grace would feed me and let me feed her. She ate a lot and her foster mom kept trying to make her eat more and more. We then went to our hotel room and tried to get Grace to sleep. We tried again to persuade the foster mother to say goodbye even if it would be hard and we would have to take Grace from her screaming but the foster mother refused. She insisted on sneaking out. Grace wouldn't sleep but let me take her to the bathroom. We washed our hands afterward and then started playing in the sink. She love to unscrew lids and dump the little containers of things in the sink. Like any 3 year old would! We had stacking cups in there and we played with them and put our feet in the sink and then took a long bath. All out of site of the foster mom. During this time the foster mom snuck out. Grace was very tired after the bath an nearly fell asleep squatting on the bathroom floor stacking the cups. Then she stood up with them to walk out of the bathroom and slipped and banged her head on the door. So the inevitable started. Poor thing just cried and cried until she was exhausted. She would not let us near her for a long time but then came to me and said Mama with her arms reaching up for me to hold her. This would be one of many sessions of deep grieving. We were prepared for this but it certainly did not make it easy. Things were about to get harder! After Grace fell asleep that night I started throwing up. There was a wonderful doctor there who had also adopted from Grace's city. He had lots of great meds for me but I quickly got behind on fluids and could not recover. During the next 4 days Rob took care of Grace and I was in bed. He was amazing with her. She was shut down a lot of the time but we would see glimpses of the Grace we had met on the first day. Nap time and bed time were extremely difficult and poor Rob had to deal with it all. I was so glad that Rob recovered so quickly from being sick before the trip. To think he might not have even been there! Both Rob's parents and I continue to comment about how amazing Rob was during this terribly difficult time. Thursday night I took a turn for the worst and we were supposed to be flying out on Friday. I was determined to get out of there and I knew there was no way I could get on a plane as I had not eaten or had much to drink in 4 days so we made the tough decision to go to the hospital. Our dear guide, Snow, took Kirk and Rob and I to the hospital in a taxi in the middle of the night. We went to the best hospital in the capital and I can't begin to tell you how filthy it was. A bug crawled under my arm when they were taking my blood. There was filth and bandages and Qtips on the floor and walls. People would just spit on the floor and parents would hold kids over the trash cans to go to the bathroom. The bathroom floor had a 1/2 inch of liquid them. Hopefully water? No toilets but holes in the ground. Rob headed back to the hotel in case Grace woke up and we ended up being there 8 hours. The medicine knocked me out but Kirk couldn't sleep in the chair so he was up all night. I got three bags of something through IV and felt great by the time we left. It all cost 44$. Unbelievable. Glad we got out of there without getting anything serious. We flew out the next day to Guangzhou.

Beijing - More details

We met our guide Lisa at the airport and the other families who are adopting from our agency. Then headed to the King Wing Hotel. The hotel was awesome. Huge rooms and great food. We saw Tienemen Square and The Forbidden City. Beijing is a great city. It was really clean and not as crowded as we thought it would be. Blue skies! The next day we saw the Summer Palace and climbed the Great Wall. It was a steep climb and the wall is 6000 miles long so it is hard to feel any sense of accomplishment. Funny. It was very crowded with people of all ages climbing very steep stairs. We ate at some great Chinese restaurants. The menus were very interesting with everything from intestines to chicken grissle to things that looked like slugs. We managed to order some things we could recognize. Our guide Lisa was so great. We asked her a million questions about Chinese culture and adoption. We visited an orphanage run by our adoption agency. It is an orphanage for kids who cannot be adopted. They do not have parents but have other living relatives. They were brought to the orphanage becuase they were living in extreme poverty or their exteneded families were just not able to take care of them. It was such a neat visit. The tears were flowing! The kids danced and sang and read from Psalms. Rob lead everyone in Amazing Grace. It was so amazing to get to experience all of this in a Communist country. We were anxious the whole time to get to Grace but it was hard leaving Beijing. It was so comfortable there. The other families would all go to different provinces to meet their children and then after days we would all meet again Guangzhou in Southern China.

in hefei

We are in hefei. we are having trouble blogging. Meet gracie in 12 hours.

We made it!!!

Off to see the Forbidden City, Tiananmen Square, and an acrobat show tonight before dinner. Weather is amazing. 75 and sunny. Food is very good so far. Ate duck wings last night. Hotel is unbelievably nice...a 5 star. More later...

Away We Go!

We are on the plane! Of course, our flight is delayed about 30 mins! Plane is updating its software. Is that good? My mom is loving the delay!
We are juiced about going and everything else has gone smoothly today. Can't wait to see and hold little Gracie for the first time!
Rob

we are ALL off to China!!!

Rob got a cat scan this afternoon and it looked amazing!!! The surgeon looked at it herself and she saw NO signs of infection. She walked in and told Rob he needs to get packed! Yeah!!! So Rob and I and Rob's parents are off to China tomorrow. Our plane leaves at noon. We meet Gracie on Monday! Did you all hear that? I will be holding Gracie in my arms on Monday! I will try to update the blog during the trip so keep checking back!

feeling better

Rob is feeling a lot better and we are getting very excited!

Travel plans and Rob's health

We are all set to go to China from Sept. 9-24. However, Rob is very sick. He has diverticulitis. He will have a second CT scan and meet with the surgeon on the 8th to see if they will let him go to China on the 9th. You can imagine this is tough news. We are working out the details that would allow me to go to China on my own if i have to. It is possible but not ideal. The good news is he is responding well to the medications and feeling better each day. Please pray that the next scan would show much healing and that he would be able to travel with us.

We leave the 9th!

We leave Sept. 9th and will be home with Gracie the 24th. We are soooo excited but our heads are spinning with all that needs to be done. I talked to the Lancaster Cleft Clinic today and they are just the most delightful group of people. Their team of doctors and specialists will see Gracie all in one appointment in mid October. They were so encouraging and insightful. Off to do some packing=)

TRAVEL APPROVAL IS HERE!

TA has arrived!!! Wow I thought I might lose my mind. Thank you for your prayers! Our trip dates to follow in the next couple days!

LWB supplies

Sandi from Love Without Boundaries sent me 6 backpacks full of baby supplies to carry to China with us. What a privilege! They are for the Anhui Cleft Healing Home. Gracie is from the Anhui Province. I so hope to be able to visit the home and deliver the supplies and hold the babies. Maybe we will choose a baby there to start sponsoring. For more info. on the healing home check out this website... http://www.lovewithoutboundaries.com/healing_homes_anhui_cleft.cfm

Prayer Requests

Our wait for Gracie has been so hard but at the same time God has been so faithful. Yes, we wish he would just swoop down and change our circumstances but instead he has taken care of us through them. I think back the to April when we first accepted Gracie's referral how my heart ached to see a picture of her smiling. Just a few days later on Easter Sunday, in such a miraculously random way, I found pictures of Gracie laughing in a hospital bed as she awaited surgery on her palate and smiling while holding her foster Dad's hand in the elevator. God knows our needs. I think about how hard the wait has been but it doesn't compare to how hard it would have been if we had not found out Gracie's palate had been repaired. I also think of all of the other answered prayer. Of having pictures of her foster parents and bother, the swine flu outbreak and all of her progress in speech since surgery. I know it is cliche but... Life is hard but God is good.

TB testing

As many of you may have heard in the news, a family was forced to leave their newly adopted daughter in China due to her positive TB test. TB testing is a new CDC regulation. If a test is positive it does not mean automatically that you child will not be issued a Visa but further tests, chest x-rays etc. would be ordered which could lengthen the adoption process in China. This was the worst case scenario until the recent news reports. However, with many adoptions occurring each month and only 1 major issue, there is no reason to be overly alarmed. Gracie will be tested for TB and receive a thorough physical examination while we are with her in China. Can you join us in praying for Gracie's health?

Waiting for Travel Approval

Hi all. We are asking again for your prayers to receive Travel Approval. 3 weeks is the norm and Friday will mark the third week of waiting for this final approval. Once received we will set dates! If the week passes with TA we will be very discouraged. Thanks for your continued prayer and support.

Another visit from Sandy!

Sandy came over this week and showed me how to make Chinese noodles. The meal was so delicious and nutritious! We all loved it and Cody kept giving us his bowl and saying more=) She used just a little olive oil to stir fry noodles, chicken and fresh vegetables. So fresh and so good. She also brought a rice cooker that I can borrow. I have used it already and love it! Sandy's daughter, Pam, also came over. She works for LGH as a pharmacist. It was great to meet her.

July Update

So we received our LOA and a update on Mei on the same day. Mei continues to progress in speech. She doesn't seem fond of getting her picture taken at all! In the first picture on the report she has such a sour face. Rob and I both said we are sure to see a lot of that face in China! They also say she is a little afraid of strangers. I continue to pray that her foster Mother will bring her to us in China and that Mei will have a little time to warm up to us. Either way it is going to be tough on this little one. A picture of her foster brother was sent which is so awesome. She will miss this little guy and it will help to have a picture. He is 2 years old so Cody will be her new Di di (little brother). His Love Without Boundaries name is Drew and he is such a cute little guy. We think his file has been sent to the CCAA for adoption so of course I have already started my search to find out if he has been matched with a family. Would be great to be able to keep in touch with them.

LOA IS HERE!!!

Our agency received our Letter of Acceptance today! We are leaving soon to go sign it and overnight it back to China!!! Now we wait up to 1 month for Travel Approval and then off to China a couple weeks after that!!! Thank you all for you support and prayers. Looks like Mei will be home for her birthday for sure. Praise God.

Visit from Sandy

We had a wonderful visit from Sandy, a lady from the Chinese Church at Calvary. Sandy is from Taiwan and speaks fluent Mandarin and loves to cook. She showed me how to make steamed egg, a dish Mei eats often most likely. Cole and Julia had a little trouble with the texture but Cody inhaled it by the bowl full=) We also recorded some words and phrases in Chinese on our computer. The kids are so good at repeating the words but Mom needs practice=) I will take a trip to a Chinese grocery store with Sandy next week and then we will come home and prepare a meal together. We are hoping that familiar foods will be a comfort to Mei when everything else in her world is changing. Sandy will also come over when we bring Mei home to talk with her in Chinese and translate for us. What a blessing! We are so thankful for Sandy and her willingness to share her time and talents with us. This wait is so hard but God is so good.

Gratitude Journal

Quote: Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denials into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today and creates a vision for tomorrow. - Melody Battine

We are grateful for:

1. Answered prayer:

We have been praying about all of the reports saying how shy and timid Mei is. In the most recent report they say that she is becoming much more engaging. This is wonderful to hear.

2. Palate repair

It crossed my mind as we are becoming discouraged with this wait that we need to be so thankful that Love Without Boundaries and Dr. Ness' medical team closed Mei's palate in April (on Rob's birthday). If this had not occurred the wait to bring Mei home would be even more difficult. To know that she has jumped this medical hurdle that allows her speech to improve etc. is such a blessing.

Word from Beijing

We got word from Beijing this morning. There are no problems with our paperwork and it is not lost or anything. The person in China who is doing our case is just slow. How unlucky. She said she will make it a priority and get it out in the next couple weeks. I was hoping tomorrow. Fortunately, our next approval (TA) goes through a different office in China.. Although it is frustrating to wait so much longer than needed we were happy to hear that there are no problems.

Still Waiting

We are sadly still waiting for our LOA (Letter of Approval). We are now seeing parents who received referrals after us receiving their LOAs. This is very hard. Samuel Fang, the President of our agency, is headed to China tomorrow and will inquire about our LOA. Our social worker says not to worry and that each case is just processed differently. After LOA we wait for another approval called a TA (Travel Approval) so the waiting game will continue. Please pray for Mei Mei's health, happiness, and progress with her speech and interaction with her foster family. Pray for us as our hearts ache to bring our little one home. We change our focus a bit and pray that we can bring her home before her 3rd birthday on Oct. 1st. We don't want to miss any more birthdays.

Family Age

As we continue to wait for our LOA I am diving into a book called Parenting Your Internationally Adopted Child. It is very practical and informative. I am realizing that we will parent this child very differently. A lot of the parenting concepts in the book are counter-intuitive. One thing the book continues to emphasize is "family age". Instead of setting your expectations of the child by their chronological age you consider their "family age" or the amount of time that she has been in your family. When we first bring her home we will consider her to be as needy as an infant who needs to eat every two hours, interrupts family meal time, needs to be held often, and needs attention during the night. Another main emphasis of the book is to be very open about the child's past and adoption and communicate about it on a daily basis. I am sure all those close to us will find the way we parent Mei peculiar! What an adventure raising this little one will be.

False Alarm

Sorry all. We are now rethinking the name. Next time we make an announcement we will make sure it is the one.

Gratitude Thursdays

So I missed a Thursday already. My excuse is that two little ones around here hog my computer! I wrote too much on my first gratitude blog. Now I really have to think=)

We are grateful for:

1. Answered prayer:

We had prayed that Mei Mei would have interaction with other children. She certainly will when she comes home. Our prayers were answered as her last report stated that she plays with her friends and brother!

2. Strength:

We continue to be strengthened by God's Word. His strength is perfect when our strength is gone! Apart from Him we can do nothing but through Him we can do all things through Him who gives us strength! Man cannot live by bread alone! Pardon my paraphrasing. Here is a verse we are grateful for. Hope, joy, peace, trust. We need it all!

Romans 15:13May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.

NEW UPDATE!

We came home from a Memorial Day picnic at the Fishers to find a new update on Mei! She seems to be doing very well! They report that she has been much more active lately and enjoys playing with her friends and brother! We did not know she had a brother. Not that he is a biological brother. We are assuming he is also a foster child. They are usually placed in pairs. We are happy she has a little one to interact with. We will be adding him to our prayer list. We hope that he will also be adopted and if so, we hope to find out who his adoptive parents are. We are so thankful for a positive report with specific information about things we have been praying about.

Gratitude Thursdays

I thought we would start the habit of taking time each week to express the things we are thankful for as we endure this challenging wait.

We are grateful for:

1. Answered prayer:

As you can see on our prayer list we had been praying for pictures of Mei's foster family and we now have a picture of her foster Mom! We are still unsure if she has any foster siblings and we already have a picture of who we think is her foster Dad but this new picture we received in an update is such an answer to prayer! We will need to help Mei say goodbye and pictures will help in this process. Of course we are hoping for more and the chance to meet them in person in China. But for now, Yeah God!


2. Time with Cole, Julia, Cody!

Any new addition to the family can be challenging. We know, we have done it three times=) Although everyday we have to wait to bring home Mei Mei is difficult we are considering it a blessing to be able to spend focused time and soon summer fun with Cole, Julia, and Cody. (Cody is at the moment in the creek bare naked except for water shoes)

3. Time to prepare:

There is sooo much to do before our trip. We must rearrange and redecorate the bedrooms along with many other household projects. We are still learning a lot from adopted parents and other resources about cl/cp and what to expect when adopting a toddler. The list of "things you want to get done before the baby arrives" is very long!

4. Amazing resources:

I am trying to start a life book for Mei and it is amazing how much I already know about her past. It is such a wonderful thing to be able to collect these things for her. The way the Internet connects people is amazing! We have found pictures of the orphanage she lived in along with very detailed descriptions of the building. We found her name it various places showing that she needed to be sponsored for both her lip (2007) and palate surgeries and then that her sponsorship was paid in full. We found pictures of her recent palate surgery and the man we think is her foster Dad. We have received updates and have a pictures of her foster Mom which was an answer to one of our ongoing prayers. We found out that there are documentaries that have been made about the city she lives in. They give glimpses into everyday life there and when she is older she will be able to see what life in her city in China was like. I could go on. It is not going to be a life book it will be a life bin!

No LOA =(

Well the group of families from our agency that are adopting along with us all got LOA's today. We did not. There is certainly not anything to worry about, ours will come, but since we were a little behind the group in the overall process it will take longer. We had hoped this would not be the case. Anyway, it can still come any day now. There is no advanced notice. So, keep praying for our LOA to arrive soon so we can travel this summer.

Updates/Travel

The new picture is from an update we received from Love Without Boundaries. They do monthly updates and pictures. We should receive April's update soon. We have not yet received our LOA (Letter of Approval) which is the next step in the process. After the Letter of Approval arrives our TA (travel approval) will come about 1 month later and then it will take a few weeks to finalize our travel plans. As time goes on we get deeper and deeper into the summer so please pray we get the LOA soon.

Finally a picture!!!

Embarrassingly I needed to watch a video tutorial to finally add this photo! My goal was to really try to do it myself without calling Fred!

Swine Flu

Wow. This process is not for the weak of heart! There is an outbreak of some kind of swine flu in China. There are rumors that Travel Approvals will be held for 20-30 days and then another decision would be made. We will know more about these rumors next week. If you could pray this does not delay out trip past the summer and also that Mei Mei and those around her are not exposed. Thank you for your prayers!

Medical Stuff

Hi everyone. Just thought I would post some medical info. about cleft affected kids in general. We had researched quite a bit before the referral and continue to do so. There won't be too much time to do anything once she arrives! Try not to get overwhelmed with it all. We are trying not to too! The Lancaster Cleft Clinic is awesome. They have a team of doctors who work together to deal with all of the different issues that sometimes go along with cl/cp.

I will start with the cleft lip. As you know she was born with bilateral cleft lip and it was "fixed" when she was 2-3 months old. We think that this was done as part of a government initiative and was probably done by a Chinese doctor. We have learned that many times they just stitch the lip up so that the baby can eat and also have the chance to be adopted. Many times they do not attach the muscles in the upper lip properly and the child cannot move their upper lip. This is a problem because the child then cannot pronounce certain sounds and cannot pucker or kiss and when they smile their upper lip does not smile with them. Looking at quite a number of pictures of Mei Mei I am guessing that this is the case for her. If so, she will undergo a lip revision here to attach the muscles. We also will do plastic surgery to reduce the scarring from her first surgery. We are sure they will do a great job but we are prepared for the reality that she will have noticeable scars. As Rob says, God accepts our scars we will accept hers! We are thankful for the opportunity to walk beside her and help her to put these things into proper prospective.

Moving on to the cleft palate. As you know we were amazingly blessed to hear that a wonderful doctor from the US recently performed cleft palate surgery. We have noticed that during the cleft exchange week when Mei Mei's surgery was done the repairs of the other children were quite severe. This served the purpose of the cleft exchange program allowing US doctors to teach the Chinese doctors how to surgically correct complex problems. Of course it would be nice if Mei Mei was just thrown into the mix because of her age. We don't want to speculate about things we are not sure of so we will see. A cleft palate repair is many times once and done. However other procedures may include adjusting the length of the palate, some type of flap surgery to improve speech and the way air moves or something of that nature, and repairing holes or gaps that my occur after the first major surgery. Many of these surgeries/procdures with the lip and palate etc. can be combined especially now that the major surgeries are taken care of!

Speech therapy will probably eventually become part of our weekly routine in the Fisher family. Every cleft case is so different so it is very hard to tell how much therapy she will need. We will first focus on her emotional adjustment and learning a new language all together! We are not sure exactly where therapy will take place. We have heard that kids are given therapy at home, in school, and even the preschool setting.

Hearing problems... Some kids with clefts have some hearing loss due to infections etc. Many need tubes. Mei Mei's medical records do not indicate any hearing loss or ear infections so we will wait and see while hoping for the best.

Dental work, dental work, dental work, dental work, dental work. Need I say more?

Again, I am telling myself and all of you... do not be overwhelmed. Being born with a cleft lip/cleft palate can sure be a pain in the rear but it is not at all life threatening. We are SO BLESSED in this country to have access to such amazing health care. In China, many of these children will live their entire lives defined by this correctable condition. What an amazing opportunity we have to give this little one a future defined by her strengths, hopes and dreams. Thank you Jesus!

Prayer Requests

I want to post prayer requests down the side of the blog so they are showing all the time but I can't figure out how to do that. Anyway, here are ways specifically to pray for us. We value your prayer support above all else! I am going to call her Mei Mei (may may) because it means little sister in Chinese. I will write answers to prayer in red below each request.

1. Pray that we may be able to travel this summer while Rob is off.
2. Pray for healing as Mei Mei recovers from her recent palate surgery.
3. Pray for Mei Mei's foster parents that they may be able to prepare her as well as possible for the adoption.
4. Pray that our hearts will be knit together with hers.
5. Pray for Mei Mei's grieving process as she leaves all she knows in China and adjusts to life as a Fisher kid.
6. Pray for Rob and I as we wait. It is easy to cycle between faith and fear. This is truly an emotional roller coaster ride.
7. Pray for the swine flu outbreak.
seems to be contained!
8. Pray that we will get pictures of her foster parents and siblings, if any. This will help her in the grieving process.
received pictures of foster Mom and Dad!
received picture of foster Brother, Drew! 8/09
9. We now know Mei has a brother (not biological but most likely foster brother) so pray that he will be adopted and that we will find his adoptive parents.
10. We hear that Mei's foster parents hope that she can improve her speech. Pray that she can make progress now that her palate is closed.
reports continue to say Mei is improving in speech. She is using more words together and strangers can understand her!

That is all for now but be prepared to pray for this little one for the rest of your life on this earth=)

UNBELIEVABLE NEWS!!!

I, Casie, happened to randomly meet this lady on a blog that ended up telling me that our daughters cleft palate was fixed! We could not believe that it could be true but we found a website with pictures! A wonderful doctor from the states did 6 days of surgeries in China as part of a cleft exchange program to help teach Chinese doctors how to perform cleft surgeries. We certainly may have more procedures/surgeries in the future but this is a BIG one! This means she will not have to undergo surgery soon after she comes home! She can just get settled in. This is an amazing blessing. They did her surgery on Rob's birthday! What a belated birthday gift this was! It also was such an answer to prayer. Her referral pictures were so expressionless. This was really hard for me. I just couldn't picture her smiling or laughing or playing. I was praying for a picture of her smiling. It seemed like a hopeless prayer but the night we found out about her surgery the first picture we identified was our little girl laughing in the hospital bed! The caption read that she was entertaining everyone before it was her turn on the operating table! I can't tell you what that moment was like for me. God is taking care of so many details and is calming even the silliest of our fears. We are amazed.

2 of Everything

Hit Target today to pick up some things to send to China. I bought two of everything so if I don't get the things back I will still have one to take to China so we have some familiar things for her. I got the softest blankets ever but was worried since it is summer that it won't be useful so I also got a little bears holding on to a little blanket. It says in her file that she likes toys that make noise so I got her a glow worm that lights up and plays different songs. Julia has one too so we will take that along to China. I bought a little photo album that we will fill with pictures of our family and surroundings. Disposable cameras so her foster parents can take lots of pictures for us. Also 2 bottles of the same baby lotion. One that we will ask her foster mom to use at bedtime and 1 to keep so we can continue to use it. With all that will change in her little life it might be nice that something smells familiar. So now can you all pray that this package gets to her foster home and they use the stuff? Especially the disposable cameras so we will have pictures of her over the next few months and of her foster family. Also we are trying to find someone to translate a letter to send along with info and questions etc. Nice to have some things to do while we wait.

What about all of the other orphans?

Tragically, many predict that there are millions upon millions orphaned children in China. This is why we are astounded to think that our little on was 1 of 300 children placed in foster care through Love Without Boundaries and even 1 of 30,000 children who were part of the government initiative that lead to her cleft lip repair. I don't know how God works and how to reconcile the number of hurting children in China and all over the world but I am certain of this... the day our little girl was born and the day she was abandoned, God knew she would be our little girl. We spent the last 2 1/2 years navigating through a brutal adoption process while all along God held this little one in His hands. We thank Him for all He did to take care of her along the way. We are ready to take over now=) As we ask God about all the other children who are suffering we feel Him returning the same question. What about all of the other children? What will you (Rob and Casie) do about them? Although the need is overwhelming, we are not overwhelmed. We now see how even a small commitment like child sponsorship can impact the life of a child. We will go to China and bring the little girl we dreamed about home but we know our journey will not nearly end there. We eagerly anticipate all God has in store.

Love Without Boundaries

After we accepted the referral I was reading more closely through her files and noticed that an organization called Love Without Boundaries funded her foster care. I was having bad thoughts about what her foster home might be like, probably just fearing the worst. I thought I would look up Love Without Boundaries to see what they were all about. I sat sobbing uncontrollably as I read about how they screen foster homes and managers in China visit with the children every month and make sure that all of their needs are being met. You see, knowing that your child is out there and not being able to get her for months is so hard to take. This news was so valuable to me. I also read that they do monthly updates and pictures and that we could have all of these once she comes home. To have this bit of history for her is so amazing. Most adopted children from China have so little information about their lives in China. It is sad that we cannot access this information now because of child protection laws but we are so glad that we will have it for her in the future. I contacted the director of their foster care program and she emailed me right away telling me how excited she was that she has been adopted and that she chose the name Faith for her to be represented to her sponsors. There is a couple in the US who sponsors her foster care monthly. It is very strange to think that someone out there is getting monthly updates about our daughter and we cannot but we thank God for these people who made it possible for our little girl to be cared for over the last year. I will never view child sponsorship the same again. If you are someone who sponsors a child without thinking much of it, think again! We can't wait to sponsor a child's foster care through this program!

Expecting #4!!!

We are so excited to announce that we have been matched with a 2 1/2 year old girl in China! We had taken a break from considering the children on the special needs list since we had sweet little Cody. Now that he is a little older we started to view the list of waiting children again. We were still also in the healthy infant program but with a long wait still ahead of us. We researched conditions, prayed, and decided to consider children with minor needs under the age of 3. Our agency called us late in March with a little girl for our family! She turned 2 October 1. She was abandoned soon after birth, was found, and taken to an orphanage. She had cleft lip and cleft palate but was otherwise healthy. It took great care to feed her because of her special needs and she bonded well with her caretaker. Through a government initiative, her cleft lip was fixed at 2 months of age. Her palate remains unrepaired and will be fixed soon after we bring her home. She will also undergo surgery at some point to help reduce the scarring from her first cleft lip surgery. A year ago an organization called Love Without Boundaries provided the funds needed to place her in foster care. Foster care greatly improves the quality of life of a child living in an orphanage so we are so happy about this. I will talk more about Love Without Boundaries in another post. Because of child protection laws we are not able to share with you her name or where is from in China. We will probably use her Chinese name as her middle name but we have not decided what her first name will be yet. The kids have always called her Kate because we all love that name but we haven't decided for sure. It will take 3-6 months for us to gain approval from China to travel and bring her home. We are really praying we will be able to travel during the summer. We will be in China for about 14 days. The plan is for Rob's parents to travel with us and possibly Cole. She is 1 year older than Cody and 1 1/2 years younger than Julia. It will be nice to have the girls in the middle and Cody does really seem like he was meant to be the baby of the family!
Please don't feel obligated to keep up with our blog and our lengthy posts. This is a journey that we want to share with family and friends but I must confess that the blogs main purpose is therapy for us as we wait to bring our little girl home!